What can I say
by Obsidian Buterfly
Summary: A drabbleish one-shot for R Syaoran and C Sakura. Infinity arc. No spoilers.


_**A/N:Hello people!**_

_**I'm back with another drabble-y one-shot. I've been wanting to write one for R. Syaoran and C. Sakura's feeling for the other and their precious persons during the Infinity arc for ages. But I never **_**could**_** find a song that fit the two perfectly.**_

_**But thanks to friend of mine woke me up at one in the morning to get some biscuits, I couldn't go back to sleep. So this little baby was born as I listened to 'What can I say' by 'Dead by April'. It's an awesome song and I recommend that you listen to it while reading cuz that what I did while writing it. Here's link**_

_**http: / www . youtube . com / watch ?v= t8jksEqsnvk**_

_**(remove the spaces)**_

_**Hope you guys like it. Don't forget to leave a review.**_

_**-0-**_

A pair of sad, amber eyes followed the path that the Princess of the desert took as she limped away from him supported by the Mage of that frozen world. Behind him, he could feel the eyes of Ninja burning into his back, no doubt displeased by him.

_**I tried to be all that you need  
Tried to not ever let you down**_

But he couldn't help himself. He knew he could never replace the one that had deserted this group but he had taken up his place anyway. Or at least he had tried to. But no matter what he did, even the smallest, most insignificant acts that might have been overlooked under other circumstances now led to nothing more than misery and pain for her.

He felt a heavy hand rest on top of his head. "Don't beat yourself up over it kid." He heard the red-eyed man say in a gruff tone before he too turned around and walked away.

_**Still I can see it in your eyes  
Not good enough**_

His fists clenched subconsciously, his nails digging into the pals of his hands as his whole body shook. Her jaded emerald orbs flashed in his vision, that longing, that hurt, that pain cutting sharply through his heart. Her expression was forlorn, her lips no longer upturned in that heartwarming smile of hers. There were dark bruises underneath her eyes, no doubt a product of sleepless nights spent crying her heart out.

_**This time I believed that I really could change  
I gave it all  
This time you really are my everything**_

He whirled around, paying no mind to the small white creature observing him with sympathetic eyes. That time when he had arrived in Tokyo, he had foolishly hoped that maybe somehow… somehow he would be accepted by them. Maybe he could change for them.

_**I guess I was wrong**_

But…

_**I guess I was wrong**_

He should never have gone with them. What was he thinking? That he could just join their group and everything would be alright? That they would welcome him with open arms when he was the reason they lost their friend?

_**What can I say, What can I do  
This is who I am and I'm hurting you**_

The rain pounded on his back but he kept running, ignoring the rain water as it trailed down his cheeks, his black t-shirt and pants were soaked through but he didn't care. He had to get away from there. He couldn't change who he was. He could never become the one that they loved. The one that _she_ loved.

_**What can I say, What can I do**_

_**No matter how strong my feelings are  
I always end up hurting you  
I always end up hurting you  
I'm hurting you**_

His being there. It was breaking her apart. Every second he spent with them, he reminded her of _him._ He knew they looked alike. Heck, they could have passed off as identical twins if no one knew the truth.

_**I tried hard only to be him  
You always wanted in life  
Still I just bring you misery**_

He knew he was not him yet he tried to be him. He tried so hard to be like the one that she missed. All for her sake. Maybe if he was there for her pain might lessen if even by a fraction. How could he have been so stupid? Why hadn't he realized it before? The more he tried, the more damage he caused.

_**What can I do  
This time I believed in you in me  
When I gave it all  
This time I could see it perfectly  
I guess I was wrong**_

People watched the drenched teen race past them with curious eyes but no one tried to go after him. In the distance a pair of lackluster emerald eyes watched him run, turning away after a couple seconds as thunder flashed overhead. She knew what she was doing was wrong. But she could not help it. He was different as was she. Once she might have considered helping him but that feather had opened her eyes. They were too different.

_**What can I say, What can I do  
This is who I am and I'm hurting you  
What can I say, What can I do  
No matter how strong my feelings are**_

She could never replace her. The one that he loved. And so, she shunned him. After all they were never meant to be. Him and her. He had his princess and she had her… what was that boy to her? The one that abandoned her?

_**I always end up hurting you  
I always end up hurting you**_

The first time she had seen him, she had asked him who he was. She had never been able to decipher the emotion in his amber eyes when she had said that. By the time she came to realize it for what it was, it was too late. The damage had already been done.

_**Without you I keep crying **_

He was gone now. Gone to fulfill the promise he had made to her. Losing his own self in the process.

_**With you I am just hurting you**_

And now, the other him was here. And she was doing it all over again. After all, she was no longer that naïve and inexperienced girl that she had been at the start of this journey. She knew what she was doing to him. But there was nothing she could do about it.

_**Without you I am dying**_

He kept running, his feet splashing against the mud, his eyes not even watching where he was going. His feet in the slick slippery dirt and he fell with a strangled yell. But he didn't bother picking himself up, choosing instead to lie there in the puddle of muddy rain, feeling the cold frosty wind bite at his exposed skin as the droplets of water assaulted his body.

_**With you I am tearing your heart**_

Her choked, muffled sobs rang in his ears. And he knew he was the cause of it all. The cause of her pain. Her misery. He was the reason she cried herself to sleep every night. He was the reason why her fragile heart was shattered. The pieces to tiny and broken to fix with a simple smile. Or a kiss. There was nothing that he could do for her for he was the cause itself.

_**What can I say, What can I do  
This is who I am and I'm hurting you**_

Sakura watched the rain splatter against her window. Dried tracks of tears staining her pale cheeks. He was miserable. She knew it. He was searching for someone in her that wasn't there just as she was searching for someone in him that wasn't there. But they were who they were. Nothing could change that and that truth alone was enough to break them apart.

_**What can I say, What can I do  
No matter how strong my feelings are**_

Syaoran tuned on his back, feeling the water trail down his body, adding to the puddle he lay in. No one could tell if the water trailing down from the sides of his face was rain or something else. He loved her. and she loved him. He knew they did. But she wasn't the one. Just like he wasn't the one either. They both loved the other but at the same time that other was someone else entirely.

_**I always end up hurting you**_

"I'm sorry," she whispered, closing her eyes, feeling the moisture gather at the sides but she didn't try and stop it.

_**I always end up hurting you**_

"I'm sorry," he breathed, welcoming the cold as it numbed his body, raising Goosebumps on his skin but he didn't make any attempts to retain what little heat his body had left.

_**I always end up hurting you**_

"I'm so sorry," he let his eyes drift to a close as lightening flashed across the sky.

"I'm so sorry," she rested her head on the back of her chair, hearing the deep rumble outside.

"_**I'm hurting you."**_

_**-0-**_


End file.
